REPUBLICAN CHRISTMAS CAROLS
By Richard Nathan
White Christians (sung to the tune of "White Christmas")
My favorite folks are white Christians
Who don't give Democrats a break.
The God we believe in
Says, "Kill the heathen
And burn witches at the stake!"
My favorite folks are white Christians
Who won't put up with any vice.
Guys like Dick Cheney are nice
And tokens like Condoleeza Rice!
A Mandate Clear (sung to the tune of "It Came Upon A Midnight Clear")
We claim it was a mandate clear
With fifty-one percent
When voters on election day
Kept our Bush President.
Piss on the Earth!
Pollute the air!
And shovel crap out to the sea!
That's clearly what the people want
Since they voted G.O.P.
C.E.O.'s (sung to the tune of "We Three Kings")
C.E.O.'s - we do as we please!
Making money with our decrees!
We can do it!
Nothing to it!
Laying off employees!
Oh! Oh!
Lay-off! Lay-off! It's our right!
Lay-off everyone in sight!
Those remaining
Will be straining,
Working through the day and night!
The Damnation Song (Sung to the tune of "God Bless Ye Merry Gentlemen")
God damn you homosexuals!
How dare you act so gay!
We think about you day and night
And what you do and say,
And where you put your penises -
Thank God, we're not that way!
We do not like the things you do in bed -
You do in bed -
We don't like those things, so you can never wed!
Debt Us All (sung to the tune of "Deck the Halls")
Debt us all for Halliburton!
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!
Who cares if the budget's hurtin'?
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!
Spend as if there's no tomorrow!
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!
From our friends the Chinese borrow!
Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!
Republicans Are Running The Town! (sung to the tune of "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town")
You better be good,
You better behave!
Or you're gonna end up
In Abu Ghraib!
Republicans are running the town!
We're making up lists -
Our clans and our tribes!
We help you with laws
If you pay us with bribes!
Republicans are running the town!
We know if you support us!
We know if you protest!
We know if you watch news on FOX
Or Moyers on PBS!
So you better be good!
And don't you be gay!
Or we'll lock you away
At Guantanamo Bay!
Republicans are running the town!
President George Bush (sung to the tune of "Good King Wenceslas")
President George Bush looked out
On the U.S. nation,
Taxes that the rich paid out
Caused him aggravation!
Bush's friends made lots of cash,
Surely God had blessed them!
Taxing such good men was rash!
Think of how it stressed them!
Bush had this rule sent by fax
To his legislators:
Make the wealthy free from tax!
They are job-creators!
Welfare for rich did pass!
They got what was due them!
What about the working class?
Dubya Bush said, "Screw them!"
© 2004 by Richard Nathan. All rights reserved
The author grants all internet uses to print these lyrics for their own, personal, non-commercial use. No other use may be made without the author's permission. Without limiting the foregoing, the lyrics may not be staged without the author's express permission.
Send e-mail to the author at Richard-Nathan@att.net.
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