ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE GODFATHER
by Richard Nathan
I read somewhere, sometime, that Francis Ford Coppola had said that he didn't want to make any more GODFATHER films because he felt he'd already told the complete story - and the only thing left to tell would be "Abbott & Costello Meet The Godfather."
I always thought this would be a great idea.
Maybe it could start off with Fredo telling Don Corleone that he thought since Luca Brasi had been killed, it might be a good idea to hire Luca Stello as a substitute
Later, Bud and Lou might have this conversation:
BUD
You know, these Italian gangsters have their
own way of
speaking. They use some very
strange expressions.
LOU
Like what?
BUD
For example, what would you say if I told you
that Luca
Brasi sleep with the fishes.
LOU
I'd say it's none of my business who Luca Brasi
sleeps
with.
BUD
Not, who - what!!! He
sleeps with the fishes.
LOU
The fishes??? You
mean those things that swim
around in the water?
BUD
That's right. Luca
Brasi sleeps with the fishes.
LOU
That's disgusting!
BUD
Wait a minute....
LOU
That's perverted!!!
BUD
I don't mean he literally sleeps with the fishes.
LOU
Hey, Bud, I'm a big boy.
I know when you say
someone sleeps with someone else, you don't
really
mean they're sleeping.
BUD
Let me tell you what I mean when I say Luca
Brasi is
sleeping with the fishes.
LOU
I don't want to know the details! You can keep
your dirty stories to yourself!
BUD
He's dead!
LOU
What?
BUD
Luca Brasi's dead.
LOU
Well, I'm not surprised.
BUD
Why not?
LOU
He probably caught some disease sleeping with the
fishes.
© 2000 by Richard Nathan. All rights reserved
The author grants all internet uses to print these scripts for their own, personal, non-commercial use. No other use may be made without the author's permission. Without limiting the foregoing, the plays may not be staged without the author's express permission.
Send e-mail to the author at Richard-Nathan@att.net.
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