PLAYHOUSE OF THE DAMNED
Lady Of The Night"
by Richard Nathan
The spotlight is up on GUS while the set for the next story is prepared. The one takes place in a tawdry little hotel room in a big city. The only major piece of furniture required is a rumbled bed.
You know, money can't buy love. On the
other hand, love can't buy you a ticket to
"The Playhouse Of The Damned." Our next
story is about a man in search of love, and
what happens when the girl of his dreams
turns out to be the girl of his screams. It's
called "A Lady Of The Night."
exits and the spotlight goes out. The
lights come up on the hotel room. Enter
LAMIA followed by the man she has just picked up in a bar, HERMAN.
Lamia is very sensual, in a deranged sort of way.
Herman is a nerd.
I'm sorry my lodgings aren't more elegant.
It's just a place to hang my hat, or it would
be if I had a hat. But I won't be staying here
long. I move around a lot. I have to. The
police are so small-minded.
It's not so bad.
Don't lie to me. Would you like a drink?
No, thank you. I already had more than
I'm used to at the bar. But you go right
I'll let you in on a little secret. I never
drink anything alcoholic. That's not why
I go to bars.
sits on the edge of the bed and makes eyes at Herman.
What's your name?
Herman. What's yours?
Lamia. Now, why don't we get better
acquainted. Come, sit beside me. I'm not
going to hurt you. Not unless you want me
shyly keeps his distance.
Lamia. That's an unusual name.
It's from a poem by John Keats. Lamia took
the form of a woman, but she was really a
Lamia quotes from the poem, she slithers over to Herman.
"Her head was a serpent, but ah, bitter sweet.
She had a woman's mouth with all its pearls
complete: And for her eyes – what could
such eyes do there, but weep, and weep,
that they were born so fair." I don't know
why I was given that name. You don't think
I'm a serpent, do you?
Why did you invite me to come up here?
Because I like you.
You don't expect me to believe that, do you?
I never lie, Herman.
But women don't like me! They don't. I
don't know why. There must be something
wrong with me.
nothing wrong with you. Nothing a
little time with me won't cure.
do you mean?
innocent, Herman. Most women
don't like that, but I'm very attracted to innocence.
I like to corrupt it.
that all you want from me? My
that and maybe one other little thing.
blood. I need your blood, Herman.
I'm a vampire.
I'm going home now.
heads for the door.
stops, but looks away from her.
you decided you didn't like me, you could have just said so.
You didn't have to make fun of me.
not making fun. I really am a
vampire. I survive by drinking
human blood. Really.
just remembered. I have to get up
very early tomorrow morning....
go until you hear what I have to say. It
won't take long. Will you trust
have a hard time trusting crazy people.
not crazy. Look at my teeth.
shows him her fangs.
so you've got a kinky dentist! So
goes over to the bed and picks up her purse.
She opens it, and takes out a small mirror, which she hands to Herman.
in this mirror. Try to find my
reflection. You won't be able to,
because vampires don't cast reflections.
looks in the mirror and tries to find Lamia's reflection.
It isn't there.
do you do that?
very simple. First you let a
vampire drink your blood for three nights in a row.
On the third night, you die. Then
the next night you come back as a vampire, and you never cast a reflection
is a trick mirror, right?
more, you become incredibly sensual. The
opposite sex won't be able to resist you. Think of it Herman. You
can attract any woman you choose.
woman I choose to make love to me?
Herman. Something better than
intimate. More personal.
Why don't you let me show you?
takes his face in her hands and looks into his eyes.
skin is cold.
that really matter?
don't want to die.
don't have to. You won't die
unless you decide to spend three nights with me.
You can let me drink your blood tonight, and if you don't like it, you
don't ever have to come back. It's
don't have a choice. I've never
had any woman interested in me before.
don't ever have to feel that pain ever again.
leads him over to her bed and makes him lie down.
bites him in the neck. As she
sucks his blood, Gus the Ghoul enters. As
he speaks, the lights go down on Herman and Lamia, leaving Gus alone in a
Herman. He's really dying to get
a woman interested in him. When
he came to Lamia's room, he had no idea of the kind of necking he was in for.
But Lamia didn't lie to him. In
fact, she was extremely toothful. He
didn't die that night. But he
couldn't help coming back the next night.
Let's see if he can stay away the third night.
spotlight goes out as Gus exits. The
lights come up to reveal Lamia alone in her hotel room.
She paces, wondering where Herman is.
Then, after a moment, Herman comes in- but he's changed.
He's lost the nerdiness, and replaced it with a confidence that's very
late this evening.
I was attempting to write my will.
But I couldn't think of anyone I wanted to leave anything to.
thought maybe you'd decided not to come.
considered it, briefly. But I
thought about you, waiting for me, and I didn't want to disappoint you.
you willing to die for me?
Not just you. If it were only you, I might have been able to stay away.
But I thought of all the other women who are going to let me hold them
in my arms. All the women who
will want me.
warn you, Herman. This is your
last chance. I'll kill you if you
stay with me tonight.
never see the sun again.
all the nights like this before me, how could I possibly miss the sun?
sweet. I'm going to miss you.
moving out tonight, as soon as you're dead.
It's best not to stay in one place too long. But you won't want to see me anyway. When you wake up transformed, your thirst for warm blood will
will I have any trouble quenching that thirst.
trouble at all. But you know that
already, don't you. You know
you're becoming more attractive. Women
smile at you now, don't they? You
can leave now, live, and those women will still find you attractive.
aren't enough. I want all women
to find me attractive. I wish I'd
become a vampire years ago!
come to me! You've kept me
waiting long enough.
sits on the edge of the bed and holds out her arms to him.
Herman goes to her and she bites his neck.
The lights fade out, and a spotlight picks up Gus the Ghoul.
so Herman died. But that's not
the end of our story.
hear an off-stage voice from behind the door.
is a pounding on the door.
I was saying, that's not the end. The
Gus is again interrupted by off-stage voices.
The door's locked!
break it down!
exits and the lights come up on the hotel room. Herman lies dead on the bed, his throat a bloody mess.
Three VAMPIRE-HUNTERS break into the room.
One of them carries a black satchel.
gone! She got away again.
left one of her victims!
like she just killed him.
least we're in time to save him from becoming one of them.
Third Vampire-Hunter opens the satchel and takes out a wooden stake and a
you think she knew we were coming.
one doesn't even have fangs yet.
grow them tonight, unless we drive that stake through his heart.
never get used to doing this.
saving him from becoming a monster! Believe
me, if he could talk, he'd thank you.
Third Vampire-Hunter places the stake over Herman's heart and prepares to
drive it in. The lights go out,
and in the darkness we hear the HAMMERING.
A spotlight comes up on Gus the Ghoul.
dear. It looks like Herman's
going to die of a broken heart. But
he should have known that you're playing for heavy stakes when you love a
vampire. That's because vampires
love in vein!
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© 2000 by Richard Nathan. All rights reserved
The author grants all internet uses to print these scripts for their own, personal, non-commercial use. No other use may be made without the author's permission. Without limiting the foregoing, the plays may not be staged without the author's express permission.
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